No one likes to feel replaceable, but somewhere out there, Paula Abdul probably is feeling just that as she watches a parade of celebrities — including Victoria “Posh Spice” Beckham, Shania Twain and Mary J. Blige — settle into the fourth judge’s chair at auditions for the upcoming ninth season of American Idol.

After Paula’s Twitter announcement of her departure from Fox’s star-making phenomenon, the show’s producers have yet to name a permanent replacement for the spot next to Simon Cowell, Randy Jackson and Kara DioGuardi.

Names like Cyndi Lauper and Jessica Simpson have been thrown around, but I’ve been pushing a better candidate for years.

Like Paula, she came to fame first as a dancer, then as super-popular ’80s singer of awesome catchy hits (13 No. 1 Singles on the Pop, R&B, and Dance/Electronic charts). She’s not only kept her looks, but (and we apologize, Paula) can actually sing. And this dancing/singing diva also happens to have a few recent dance chart hits under her belt.

America, meet my candidate —
Jody Watley!
Miss Watley is the former Soul Train dancer who became famous for Looking For A New Love (which originated the phrase “Hasta la vista, Baby” years before Ah-nuld appropriated it in Terminator 2), plus Don’t You Want Me, Everything and several hits with the group Shalimar.

I wanted her to replace Paula because I was sick of Paula yammering on, spacing out and generally being kooky. But when Miss Abdul began to make noise that she might, indeed, not be Forever Your Judge, I started to wonder if my Jody dreams might finally come true.

Of course, I don’t actually know Jody Watley, and have absolutely no pull in the Idol judge picking. None of that, however, stopped me.

Surprise! It turns out that I’m not the only one who thinks that Jody, now a very fine 50, would make a very fine replacement for Paula. I put a feeler out to her people (all good divas have people) and in a few days, I was on the phone with Miss Watley herself, making my pitch to her, finding out what she’s been up to (she had some dance hits from her recent album The Makeover, just finished a summer club tour and releases a new album, Chameleon, next year) and what she’d do if she did find herself making small talk with Ryan Seacrest and suffering through another tone-deaf rendition of I Will Always Love You.

Shockingly, Jody’s got some ideas.
Q: So, for years, we’ve been pitching you as a judge on Idol, even though we had no idea if you would want to, or if you even watch the show. Do you?

A: I do! In fact, I went to the show as a guest during … what season was that? Season 2, in 2003, because one of the kids on the show at the time had mentioned me. I don’t even remember which one! Anyway, I’m a huge fan of the show. I have a love-hate relationship with it.

Q: How so?

A: You know, my friends and I, like most people who watch the show from season to season, see things that absolutely drive you nuts, like when someone gets the boot quicker than they should have. The season with Jennifer Hudson and Fantasia was the year where we said we were never watching that show again. But we go back and forth. It’s a lot of fun. On Facebook, I write posts about it and engage with my fans about it.

Q: We knew it! You’d be perfect! What do you think the judge’s job is?

A: I think that they steer the (voters’) consciousness. It’s clear that they each have people that they root for, and in their own way they guide the people. We laughed a lot this season that (judge favorite and runner-up Adam Lambert) always had the best lighting.
Q: While Kris Allen, who won, was practically singing under a lightbulb sitting on an apple crate every week.

A: (Laughs) Exactly. Personally, for some reason, I think Paula will be back, because it is a business. I think that with the press and everything surrounding it, she’ll work it out. The fans really do love her for her quirkiness. She brings a genuineness — the way she nurtures the kids is a nice balance for the rest of the judges. And like I said, her quirkiness adds to the show. She does add a lot. And if she doesn’t come back, it’ll be interesting.

Q: Which brings us to you! If you were an American Idol judge, what would you add to it? We notice that like Paula, you have a dance background as well as a singing background, making you an overall performer.

A: If I considered it, more of my (advice) would involve singing, although I do have a dance background. As an artist, songwriter and producer, being in business for three decades, I would bring my experience, and my sense of humor. I would have a way of giving constructive criticism without killing someone’s dream. I would know how to balance that, but be honest at the same time.

Q: So … have you thought about it?

A: It’s nothing I’ve ever had my reps look into. I’ve never thrown my hat into the ring. I’ve been working. But I’ve always gotten e-mails from fans saying “You should be a judge! You would make a great mentor.” That makes me smile.

Q: So would you be on the show if they asked you?

A: Absolutely! I did Randy Jackson’s radio show this year and I told him, “Yo, Dawg! When am I gonna be a mentor on the show?” And he was like “I know, I know.”

Q: Yay! If you were a judge, or a mentor, what kind of advice would you give the kids? You probably have some extra insight, having been on a TV show, Soul Train, when you were young.

A: Number one, they have to recognize that it’s a platform. When I was on Soul Train, I knew I always wanted to be a singer, so I conducted myself professionally. I wasn’t one of the dancers who was causing trouble. I was working on making myself better, thinking “What can I do to stand out?” In that situation, on Idol, it’s so huge, such an opportunity. Once you get it, you can get a little bit of exposure, pull up your sleeves and work it. Don’t wait for the machine to work it for you.

Q: Speaking of working, I read some reviews of shows you did this summer. They sound fun.

A: We were all around the East Coast — New York, Chicago, D.C. It was fantastic … it was a show, encompassing some of my classics and then newer stuff. It was really cool. Don’t You Want Me, which I co-wrote with Franne Golde, still rocks the house.
Q: You’ve had a long, long career, something the kids on Idol probably all aspire to have.

A: It doesn’t happen a lot! My solo career began in 1986, whether it was R&B, pop or dance. That all enables me to grow and try new things. The dance music I do — I’ve been doing more dance lately — is more of a soulful jazz, not disposable cheesy stuff. I love electronica music. At my shows, I see everyone from the ’80s babies to the new kids that just like music from the underground. My career has been about not getting stuck in a rut, to keep things moving forward.