Honestly, “porny” may not really be a word, but my spellcheck says it is, so I’m going with it.

My editor tells me that I’m playing into “Rolling Stone”‘s evil marketing hands even writing the following, mercifully short feminist screed about that stupid soft kiddie porny cover featuring the jailbait-looking stars of “Gossip Girl” lesbian-ishly licking a dripping ice cone that’s purposely supposed to look like they’re licking…something else.

And, yeah, I know that. But…eww. Seriously. This is not about being a prude. This is about really hating when a magazine that’s usually about music or politics panders in such a gross and obvious way to the FHM crowd, but in a way that might even squick out FHM. Also, it’s interesting to note that in the Los Angeles Times, star Blake Lively says she and fellow cover girl Leighton Meester weren’t told about the concept (featuring kiddie props like the ice cream and Twizzlers) before they got there.

When they have a photo of hot young “GG” boy stars Ed Westwick and Chase Crawford eating all sexy like on the cover, then maybe I can see somebody defending it. But that’s not gonna happen. So what we have are very young looking girls, who are adults but who play teenagers, posed to look like little girls doing a very naughty thing. Sexy is one thing. Exploitative is another.

Again, ick.

Also, the magazine is so small now, it’s like a Bazooka Gum wrapper version of “Rolling Stone.” I guess I should thank God for small favors, that I don’t have to see that thing full-sized.