“They have my dream in their hands, and that’s very scary.”

So says Kristin, one of the two members of “Team Compromise” that made it through the Group Round competition of “American Idol.” You said it sister. Crazy people will sabotage you. True of three-legged races and of American Idol group day.

Bikini Girl and Rose The Hippie make their final appearance. Yay!

Simon makes my day with his very first words during the judges’ round – “You forget the words, you’re out.” I’ve been advocating for a rule like this for ages, because there’s no reason that while the kiddies are focusing on choreography, their hair and who is in charge, they couldn’t, you know, learn the songs.

And I don’t care if they’re old songs they never heard before. When you audition for a Broadway show, the auditioners don’t say “Oh, baby we know you’re tired and you want this so bad so we’ll ignore the fact that you didn’t do your job.”

The basic drama centers on the aforementioned Team Compromise, featuring the antics of Kristen, that nervous guy with the tattoos who keeps crying, and some old-looking chick named Nancy Wilson, who looks to be the age of the other Nancy Wilson, who I imagine is in the 70 range. OK, maybe she doesn’t look 70. But she looks older than 30. Plus she kind of blows.

Also bringing the noise and the funk, in an unfortunate way, is Team Diva, featuring Hippie Rose, Bikinatrina, and some girls unfortunate enough to get stuck with those two. Katrina is still as pleasant as she has been, which is not at all, so when she decides to take a nap and leave her group to fend for themselves, they go on without her. And when she refuses to get out of bed when they come for her that morning, they have to go on without her again.

And when she and Rose bomb, and get bounced, Katrina refuses to even hug anyone. I am so happy not to have to look at that ridiculous girl anymore, at her stupid posing and at her insistence that everyone but her has a problem. That’s rigght, honey, you keep on believing that every time something bad happens it’s not your fault. We’ll see how far you get in life. How so very sad. Don’t let the door hit your bikini bottom on the way out!

So we lose Rose, Bikini, David The Hottest Osmond and a bunch of other people, but keep Katrina the annoying laugher and my two favorites, Danny and Jamar. Can’t we just have them win? We can call it “Danny/Jamar Idol” and I can take a nap.