You’re a mean one, Mr. Cowell!

I’ve written extensively about the “Gladiator” aspects of the new “American Idol” judging system, in which the panel can choose to save a singer that America has already given the heave-ho. It’s really cruel, but it’s not likely they’ll use their veto power any time soon, because they only get to do so once.

So I knew that it was very unlikely that Megan Joy Corkrey, the sweet little hippie dippie single mom, was going to earn that one “Get Out Of Booting Free” card. But I didn’t expect Simon to be so nasty about it. Basically, earlier in the show, Meggie said that she didn’t care what Simon said, so when he get a chance to stick it to her, he acted like a 12-year-old waiting all day to stick it to her best frenemy.

“You don’t care,” he said, all pout and pettiness “and neither do we.”

Oww. Not attractive. It’s less like just desserts and more like a very powerful man bullying a weaker, powerless girl.

In other news, I have made an important decision…at least to me. In the “Boot Camp” columns I wrote for the print version of the Post for the last few years, I had come to designate one contestant a season as the Basket of Puppies (BoP), the singer so irritatingly cuddly and sweet and full of music and concerned about the children who are the future that they’re as hard for America to vote off as a basket of adorable puppies.

And after watching the judges slobber over Scott’s boring, boring “Just The Way You Are,” I have decided to designate him 2009′s official Basket of Puppies. And I’ll be advocating his booting until he’s gone. Because I’m a mean woman and puppies aren’t that cute.